<< FAST FORWARD ANNUAL CHRISTMAS NEWS LETTER
$eason of "92"
A long winded & lyrical look at the quality frivolity in the continuing short story serial about the observations and adventures of a mans private passion with his ocean racer.  He was raised by the water, got bigger, but somehow never grew up. 
(For maximum effectiveness and enjoyment, read newsletter at room temperature very late at night warm in bed on Christmas Eve.

Heading head-on into the heart of the snow munching, ice crunching holiday season with my mistletoe belt buckle, think of this silly newsletter as a print Christmas tree decorated with blue lights smothered in angel hair. Right now it's cold and snowing and to say that it was a lousy summer is an understatement-because I'm writing this at the end of August.

YEAR IN REVIEW
The hot weather never really came this year.  The general occasional comment was, "this was a weird weekend-it almost seemed like summer!".   I pride myself on finding the positive in everything, sort of a gratitude attitude--so the bright side was that I saved a lot of money not having to buy sun block; the ice for drinks on the boat lasted for days and days and I didn't have to open the hatches to let a breeze come through the boat.
At home I didn't have to use my ceiling fans; the house didn't get dusty by having to open windows and the fridge setting was on low and the milk still froze.   Need I go on?
COME SEE US ROCK & ROLL
My 60's nostalgia band worked about 50 jobs last summer, and for the first time our outfits of leather motorcycle jackets were not too hot.  We are now booking the holidays.  We would love to play your private party or just have you come heckle us at a job.  January 15 (the third Friday in January) we will be playing at Excalibur Nightclub at 625 North Dearborn right across from the Hard Rock Cafe downtown.   Music is from 9 PM until 1 AM in this 60,000 square foot palace.
Always call the hotline to confirm before you leave that night (or any job) in case some booking agent screwed up. 

THE POLITICS OF BOATING
The annual Park District meeting at the beginning of the year on January 16 was interesting with Bob Nelson at the helm sailing his unique sense of humor.  He called attention to the fact that 80 million people use the lakefront each year.  The many improvements that the city is doing each year are being greatly appreciated by us boaters.
In true Chicago fashion, coincidentally St. Patrick’s Day is local Election Day and the precinct captains encourage us to vote early and vote often.  We are rewarded later when the bars open serving cross-cultural green beer.
The January boat show was disappointing showing only Fountain and Formula sport boats with a general lack of enthusiasm.   The price of admission was $1.00 more this year for the privilege of seeing less and fewer vendors.   I will try to remember to forget it this year.
APRIL FOOLS
I was calendar confident that spring was here, but April fools day arrived with light snow all day.   In-between getting the boat ready and the IRS it became a very taxing time.
April 13 was a good day to be on a boat as The Great Chicago Flood arrived.  When the water finally went down, the concerns went up about who will pay.  I wouldn't be surprised if the city again makes a motion to add a special flood tax to Chicago boaters because after all--they  like water so they should pay!.  Which brings to mind a new organization called Concerned Boaters fighting for boaters’ rights.   If you're interested in subscribing to the bimonthly publications write them at 601 West 1st Street, Stuart FL,  34994  at only $25 per year.
Memorial Day weekend was hot and sunny-NOT!   Cloudy crud and dismal darkness In true Chicago unpredictable weather was a washout with all time record cold at 32 degrees, canceling the WXRT fireworks extravaganza 2 days in a row to celebrate the beginning of summer.  I was in the cabin with a propane heater waiting for the display on the third night.  I guess it was appropriate because the beginning of summer never really came anyway.  The latest freeze changed picnics to parkas in the overt overcast.
NO SUN-NO FUN
The last week of June (The first week of summer) welcomed in the season with 3 days of all time record breakers as the the temperatures dropped to 44.  Even July 2nd tied the record low of 53 degrees.   All this apparently due to the volcano on the other side of the earth which (dare I say) could keep temperatures below normal until 1994.
4th OF JULY
  I am able to see fireworks from the ball park in my back yard on my sundeck as well as from Burnham Harbor where my boat is moored.   Having to collect rents on the 1st of July, I had my knees in the breeze rushing to relax  so I could finish business by the holiday.   More record cold on July 21 down to 67 degrees.
DOG DAYS OF AUGUST
By the time August rolled around there were only 4 days which even reached 90 degrees.  To date the first day of 91 degrees was an exhibition game in the savage ballet of football.  60 thousand crazed fans were looking for a place to park at Soldiers Field in the now 91-degree heat.  Something again looks out of place.
Meanwhile I'm on the boat enjoying doing absolutely nothing.  The only problem with doing absolutely nothing is that you never really know when you are finished!  When I got tired of doing nothing I would light the fuse and aim the boat at the sunset like a misguided guided missile heading anywhere on the secret course I've charted in my cerebral map.
With the chill of fall in the air even in August, I must set the heating control in my Jacuzzi with longer and longer settings to maintain 106 degrees.   Then more and more cold records are set and I loose all hope for an Indian summer. 
Furthermore I got nervous in mid September afraid of a hard freeze which could unexpectedly break the motor blocks.   Therefore, in the midst of all the records this year, I set two records of my own (as sort of a protest vote) and 1.--take the boat out of the water earlier than I ever have on October 3rd! and 2.--start winding up my shortest newsletter ever.  It's time to winterize and put the beast to sleep--even before the season ended.  Then as predicted in true Chicago fashion an all time record hard freeze of 21 degrees occurs October 20th.
MOM SET ADRIFT ON THE ULTIMATE VOYAGE
On Feb 8th my dear mother unexpectedly passed away and slipped quietly into eternity, with the quickness of a wink of an eye.  She knew how to live well and she had savored all 4 seasons, 78 times.  Imagine seeing 312 seasons change-all in good health!  I find comfort knowing that.
My first experience at being executor took almost 3 solid months, reminiscent of my childhood during one of my moms Easter egg hunts that she would stage for my sister and I as children.  I kept looking and looking for loose ends until no stone was left unturned.
She was always a good sport and came boating with me often up to the very end.  I have a lot of fond boating memories with her and we would laugh outloud when we got caught in the rain.
When I would pick her up on shore, people would stare and stare at the 78 year old woman slowly and carefully getting in the loud, rumbling, wild looking racing machine.  It's like a child's exercise in the Weekly Reader asking, "can you tell me what's wrong in this picture?"   Of course, she didn't think anything ever looked out of place-which is what made her a real piece of art work, one of a kind.  They just don't make'em like that anymore!
One 4th of July I was entertaining some of my friends and mom came along anticipating the evenings fireworks display like a child.  There was a thunderstorm and we all got soaked.  She didn't think anything of taking off her wet cloths and hanging them on the radar arch to dry, like a cloths line.  We then looked like a floating trailer park during which time she held a perfectly normal conversation with everyone in her underwear while holding a drink in one hand and waving to passing boats with the other.
I will always think of her on the water and especially remember watching her glowing face looking up and smiling like a little girl after each colorful fireworks explosion.  Thanks for the memories mom!
I suppose we need some clouds in our life in order to have a beautiful sunset.  Never the less I must admit that if a bad boating season is the worst of my problems I guess things can't be too bad.  Mom taught me the most important thing in life is our health (and the only incurable disease that I have is Boating.)
Now there's only the memory of last year with mom.  Early to bed, early to rise, work like hell & advertise.  I have no excuse not to be productive during the endless winter.  I even find time to be a director at the local Kiwanis Club, of all things.  When you help someone up a hill, you find yourself closer to the top.  I guess what I'm trying to say is that only in America are we free to choose what we choose to choose. 

Already I have impatient patience for next years boating season.
Have a deliciously rich Holiday Season and a great New Year--all year.

CAPTAIN BILL